Blessings in disguise

As painful as it is the not be having babies the 'usual' way, I have been blown away by the love but also some unexpected conversations with people. I have been amazed to talk with people that have direct experiences with adoption or infertility. These conversations have been a huge encouragement to me during this time, and I want to thank everyone who has done this. You know who you are. I love to be able to be real with people, and now that I have exposed a very hard time in my life, I have been blessed to see other's hidden, hurtful areas. As hard as it is, I love it. So I just wanted to say thanks for being awesome you guys. Thanks for putting yourself out there, I appreciate it.

Although this time is very painful, I have really been blessed by these encounters. They have really encouraged me in the decision Justin and I have made. And some days, I really need people's unconditional support for our decision. We know that we want to adopt and that this is the path God has chosen for us, but there are some days that I think it will take so long, and it will be too painful, but I also know it will be worth it in the end.

Since beginning this process, somedays I feel like I'm on edge. I have never really been anxious before, and it drives me crazy how anxious I get some days. I know that I struggle a lot with trusting God's provision in this situation. I'm anxious about if someone will choose us, I'm anxious about not being ready for the baby when it comes and I'm anxious about all the fundraising. I have this huge fear that no one will come to our banquet. But I know this is not true (as a side note, please buy tickets soon so I can give the caterer numbers!). I find that these occasional encounters with people have really calmed me, and reassured me that this is what is supposed to happen.

So on a side note, I wanted to let you guys know that we have many items coming together for our silent auction, so please come and bring your wallets with you! I am contributing a hand made Dr. Seuss quilt, that is going to be completely awesome. It has helped put my mind at ease during this time, and has also helped me expand my craftiness. I'm trying a new technique that I have never done before on any of the other quilts I have made, you'll have to come to the banquet to check it out!

So please bring everyone you know to the banquet. Please if you feel compelled to talk to me about a situation that you are in or have experienced, don't be afraid. I really love having these conversations with people, even though it usually ends with both us crying. Thank you guys for being awesome.

See you guys at the banquet.