Hey everyone, so I thought I would write a bit of a blog for those that follow our blog and aren't friends with us on facebook.
One week ago today, we received a call from our adoption agency letting us know that they had decided to pull our match with our birthmom. They felt she had changed her mind about the adoption. This was the day before she was supposed to be induced, so we aren't sure whether baby was born and she started changing her mind or if she was still waiting to be induced. From the sounds of it the communication started getting a bit distant between our birthmom and the agency.
We have since heard nothing about this baby, so as it appears now - this child is not going to be our son. We were devastated hearing the news, but we have actually been a bit surprised how well we are doing. We lost a significant amount of cash in this failed match which has been actually the most frustrating part of it all (after grieving the fact that we are not getting the baby of course). We have worked hard to fundraise, and it's really frustrating how in an instant a lot of that money is gone. So we are dealing with our anger towards the situation.
The plus side to everything is that our agency really tries to get us another match as quickly as they can; they put us immediately to the top of the list (we're number 1, we're number 1!). I spoke with the agency yesterday and our profile had already been shown to another mom, 6 days after our match fell through. We are really hoping and praying that a match comes quickly and that it is an instant placement, meaning that baby has been born and all papers are signed. That way we know that baby is ours and there is no fear that it could fall through again.
We have been overwhelmed by love and support, as you are all so amazing. So thanks. We are settling back into normal life in which it feels again, like we will be waiting for an eternity.
Please pray for us. It seems like everyday I have new emotions with the situation, it all kind of feels like it was just a dream. Excitement for a baby, and then back to the junky feeling of the never ending wait. Almost like the 9 weeks we were matched never happened. I'm not sure what is going to happen. We know and trust that God has a plan in all of this, even though this isn't what I would have planned for myself. You can also pray for me as I go back to work next week, which I feel like is the most disappointing thing that I'm dealing with. I love my job, but was so excited to have the next 8 months off with my new baby, but that's not happening. So it's back to everything again. We are quite disappointed, but still have hope that we will be parents, and hopefully soon!
Thanks for all the love! We are truly blessed with an amazing community of friends and family around us!
